Everyone agrees that triple talaq is against human spirit and must be stopped. But what is the way? Will making it punishable be sufficient? We have laws against murder and rape but they still happen. So what is the right thing to do?
First of all no government should make religion specific laws. It is against the spirit of constitution and equality. Laws must be universal and all citizens must be covered under it. Also there should be no emotional hype around laws. Law making should be done in a calm, careful and thoughtful manner. And finally, law must serve its purpose otherwise it will only add to chaos.
First we must consider what is the issue. It is an issue of rights and misery of women affected by instant rejection and separation. Purpose is to eliminate misery and maintain dignity of women. It should be remembered that this is not about religion, this is true across all sections of society. Dignity of every women is equally important.
How instant separation affects women? It is impossible for a woman of any age to come out and survive. There is issue of security, financial difficulty and basic accommodation and living. Therefore punishment may act deterrent in some cases but will fail to stop it as people will always find loophole. Another thing that must be remembered that relationship in most cases is already dead or at least spoiled. Compulsion can not keep any relationship alive and healthy. A person who does not honor commitment of relationship and marriage, it is better to leave such person. So instead of stopping separation focus should be on how women can have safety and dignity.
There is simple way to manage this issue
- Do not make religion specific law
- Registration of all marriages must be made compulsory be it solemnized in any religion or across religion any method or ritual
- Law should specify that only accepted separation will be one agreed by court or family court
- In case of immediate separation which is done by man and accepted by him it should be specified in law that woman will have right to live in the house till the matter is compromised or settled. Man must leave house and should be barred from entering house till final settlement. In addition man must immediately give a lump sum and monthly fixed amount ( and rent if house is on rent) for basic living. Final maintenance may be decided by court later. In case where man refuses to pay, there should be monthly increase in penalty. This power to release fund must be there with family court as well as women's commission. They should direct bank / employer of man for such release. Places where such courts and offices are not present there police station or even panchayat should be able to obtain such orders to bank / employer.
- Government can create smart phone app / helpline no where women can contact and obtain immediate relief. All they are supposed to do is call or intimate. It should be mandatory for women police and / or officials of women's commission to reach on spot immediately and make sure woman is safe and attains right to be in house.
- Acceptance of immediate separation by man is must to prevent misuse of power by women.
- Women must have a personal bank account with some kind of marriage insurance. Both boy and girl side must contribute to this insurance as lump sum premium. In case of any kind of separation, women will get this amount immediately. If marriage continues it should be converted into her old age pension.
- It should be remembered that ultimately dignity is to be earned not given. So women should not rely too much on men. Government and families must focus on women education and skill development.
Relationships are sensitive and disharmony is not uncommon. It is wiser to teach relationship values than using fear to keep relations intact.
First of all no government should make religion specific laws. It is against the spirit of constitution and equality. Laws must be universal and all citizens must be covered under it. Also there should be no emotional hype around laws. Law making should be done in a calm, careful and thoughtful manner. And finally, law must serve its purpose otherwise it will only add to chaos.
First we must consider what is the issue. It is an issue of rights and misery of women affected by instant rejection and separation. Purpose is to eliminate misery and maintain dignity of women. It should be remembered that this is not about religion, this is true across all sections of society. Dignity of every women is equally important.
How instant separation affects women? It is impossible for a woman of any age to come out and survive. There is issue of security, financial difficulty and basic accommodation and living. Therefore punishment may act deterrent in some cases but will fail to stop it as people will always find loophole. Another thing that must be remembered that relationship in most cases is already dead or at least spoiled. Compulsion can not keep any relationship alive and healthy. A person who does not honor commitment of relationship and marriage, it is better to leave such person. So instead of stopping separation focus should be on how women can have safety and dignity.
There is simple way to manage this issue
- Do not make religion specific law
- Registration of all marriages must be made compulsory be it solemnized in any religion or across religion any method or ritual
- Law should specify that only accepted separation will be one agreed by court or family court
- In case of immediate separation which is done by man and accepted by him it should be specified in law that woman will have right to live in the house till the matter is compromised or settled. Man must leave house and should be barred from entering house till final settlement. In addition man must immediately give a lump sum and monthly fixed amount ( and rent if house is on rent) for basic living. Final maintenance may be decided by court later. In case where man refuses to pay, there should be monthly increase in penalty. This power to release fund must be there with family court as well as women's commission. They should direct bank / employer of man for such release. Places where such courts and offices are not present there police station or even panchayat should be able to obtain such orders to bank / employer.
- Government can create smart phone app / helpline no where women can contact and obtain immediate relief. All they are supposed to do is call or intimate. It should be mandatory for women police and / or officials of women's commission to reach on spot immediately and make sure woman is safe and attains right to be in house.
- Acceptance of immediate separation by man is must to prevent misuse of power by women.
- Women must have a personal bank account with some kind of marriage insurance. Both boy and girl side must contribute to this insurance as lump sum premium. In case of any kind of separation, women will get this amount immediately. If marriage continues it should be converted into her old age pension.
- It should be remembered that ultimately dignity is to be earned not given. So women should not rely too much on men. Government and families must focus on women education and skill development.
Relationships are sensitive and disharmony is not uncommon. It is wiser to teach relationship values than using fear to keep relations intact.
